It's been a fun ride the past few months. I had forgotten how joyous and beautiful life can be in the past few years. After departing from a relationship of ten years, I felt lost for momentarily, trying to remember how to live a single life again and trying to remember how to reclaim my individuality.
Facing the new chapter in my life with uncertainties, being older and more matured, I realized that I was handed back my pen to write my own stories hereon out. My life was back in my control. I was not the same person I was a decade ago. I grew, I matured, and I've become a new individual.
Life is short. With new determination to make my next chapter exciting, I pressed forward.
The first step I knew was to seek out mental therapy and to bring my mental health under my control. I needed some time to myself to be human by embracing my emotions and bringing my past traumas to closure.
As I was seeking mental healthcare, I began undoing my habits and learning new ones. I began exploring hobbies I have put off to the side, many of them that I have never dabbled in before. I reached out to friends and family members, vowing to be more socially active, to become a person I want to become.
In the past months, I've accomplished much in a short time frame. It's been fun exploring the midwest for the first time, driving through at least six states alone. It was fun exploring the northeastern states-- upstate New York and Pennsylvania being some, and reuniting with my old roommate and best friend I had known since 2014, then doing a roadtrip together across multiple states.
It's been fun solo summitting Mt. Marcy in the Adirondacks wilderness. It was fun attempting Mt. San Gorgonio on the first try, and was fun exploring the California lava tubes. I got to pick up rock climbing, slowly getting in to overlanding and canyoneering. I started investing my time in to bushwhacking and generally started trying to explore new things on my own.
What else did I do though? I got deeper in to intelligence gathering, working to position myself to change career in to the world of cyber threat intelligence or general intelligence work. With surmountable free time on weekday spent studying and reading up on research papers, whitepapers, articles, books, and watching videos to improve my knowledge and get exposure to new ideas.
In all that time of exploring and doing new things, I found happiness in myself again. I feel a sense of self returning. I came to remember the old attitudes I had: I am in control of my life. I want to grow. I want to become a person I aspired to be. I want to make positive impacts. All that needed was a step forward to kickstart the momemtum.
The future is bright. There are many more things I'm looking to try and accomplish. May the road be paved with good lucks and fortune.